How to Balance Time Online and Off

This is a question that I am asked often. Everyone wants to know how to balance time online and off; between family and online activity. How do you do it all? My secret: I don’t do it all. That is the bottom line.

Get your “priority” straight – I used to live my life in this “priority” frame of mind. By the time I made it past God, husband, and kids then there was no time or energy left for house, ministry, and everything else. Then it dawned on me that God is my only priority. Now I ask Him every day, “What do you need me to do today, Lord?” Sometimes it is about my husband; sometimes ministry; sometimes a friend. I’ve found that if I just make God and His will my only priority then He spreads me around to accomplish each day what I need to get done.

“Give us this day our daily bread.”

Do I always get it right? No. I mess up on many occasions. In fact, just recently I threw my hands up and called my mom-in-love to come get Matthias because I just could not carry him one more step. That boy is almost 28 lbs of pure energy. He had head butted and kicked me so many times (because he gets easily excited) that I was just about to drop to the ground. I got frustrated with other things too and it wasn’t until this evening that I realized that I did not read this morning and I did not ask Him what I should do today. I didn’t put Him first.

Set a timer and keep a to do list – I also watch my time like a hawk. I set a timer for replying to email and working on my blog. I have a “to do” list for every day and I use it as a guide; a reference for what I should accomplish. For online stuff I keep digital post its with my list of what needs to get done. When I have work to do online then I turn off email & chat, don’t click on links, and check things off as I go. I don’t let sites like Facebook and Twitter suck up my time either. I use them on occasion but I am not a die hard user.

I also reward myself for getting things done. If I accomplish my online to do list in say two hours then I make myself a frappacino or use my special bubble bath. I know it might sound strange but having a goal and a reward to look forward to motivates me to get things done. It helps me to focus.

Eliminate stress – Another secret I can share is that I realized that when I was stressed or in constant thought about something then it caused me to wander the internet aimlessly. Before I realized what happened the 2 hour timer would go off and I would have done nothing productive. My thinking about whatever was bugging me was in the forefront and my browsing the web was more or less done unconsciously. When I sit down to write or work then I shut my brain off to everything else. I listen for Matthias and the boys but my focus is on what I am doing. If something keeps popping up in my mind then I add it to my digital post it or I write it down in my notebook. Many times while I was online I would get great ideas but instead of quickly researching or implementing those ideas I just write them down for another day and get back on task.

Another trick is to close all other applications except for the one you need to accomplish your tasks. If you are trying to write and schedule posts then turn off your email & Twitter alerts. Close out Facebook and Google +. Close out every tab except the ones that you need for the immediate task. Those things can distract you easily and steer you off course.

Be flexible and submissive to His spirit – And like I said I do have a daily to do list but I don’t follow it religiously. If I don’t do something on that list then my life isn’t over. I simply put it on hold for another day. Some days I don’t get around to blogging or doing things for for some of my online projects because other things need to get done. There are also weeks that go by when I don’t reply to any email. Sometimes people get upset but I don’t feel bad because I was putting first what I felt God wanted me to do. I really do just depend on Him for guidance as to what to do.

Tip: If you do intend to ignore email for a while it is best to set up an auto response to let people know that you will eventually get back to them but it won’t be anytime soon because you are taking a break.

Support from your spouse is priceless – Ryan is a BIG help. He doesn’t mind helping with laundry, dishes, cook, clean, whatever needs to get done. He recognizes that we are a team and doesn’t mind helping out regularly. I am really blessed in that sense. He knows that I have to work sometimes and that my “work” helps me to wind down. He is also the first to tell me to go take a bubble bath when he sees that I am wound up a bit too tightly.

Make time for family – We also take time together a couple of nights a week to watch TV on the couch. It helps to laugh and get excited about things. Sometimes we’ll watch a movie but we both find it helps our emotional well being to allow ourselves to be distracted by the shenanigans on The Cake Boss or to laugh our heads off at Wipeout. Emotions are easily induced which means if I am stressed and I watch something happy then my stress goes away. Ryan and I are similar in the sense that he and I both have to deal with things immediately. We don’t let them stew or brew. That in and of itself is a stress eliminator.

Learn to let go of things – And all of that online stuff I do… I downsize quite often. I have had to walk away from other online projects that I was involved in because I know that they are in good hands and I needed the time I was devoting to those projects. I also stopped doing all design work (besides my own, of course!) Now I just spend my time with my blog, DIY Ministry and AWI – and I’m downsizing that now too because I have a bigger project in the works. I’ll be contributing to two online publications on a regular basis but have gone to strictly guest posting on others. Other than that I don’t regularly obligate myself so that I don’t let myself or anyone else down. There are seasons in life and sometimes we can handle a lot and sometimes we can only handle a little. You have to stay close to Him to know what season of life you are in.

I don’t over think it; over plan it; and I don’t wait until I think I have enough time to do it “just right”. That has always hindered me in the past. Now I just do a little at a time. And it is amazing how much God has rewarded that.

Oh and the power water I drink… it’s just good ol’ iced tea.

What do you do to balance it all? How do you make it work?